1). Tech Support: “I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.”
Customer “Ok.”
Tech Support: “Did you get a pop-up menu?”
Customer: “No.”
Tech Support: “Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?”
Customer “No.”
Tech Support: “Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?”
Customer: “Sure, you told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote ‘click’.”
2) Customer: “I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message.”
Tech Support: “Did you install the update?”
Customer: “No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?”
3).Customer: “I’m having trouble installing Microsoft Word.”
Tech Support: “Tell me what you’ve done.”
Customer: “I typed ‘A:SETUP’.”!
Tech Support: “Ma’am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.”
Customer: “It says ‘[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk’.”
Tech Support: “Insert the MS Word setup disk.”
Customer: “What?”
Tech Support: “Did you buy MS word?”
Customer: “No…”
4).Customer: “Do I need a computer to use your software?”
Tech Support: ?!%#$
5).Tech Support: “Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the ‘OK’ button displayed?”
Customer: “Wow. How can you see my screen from there?”
6) Tech Support: “What type of computer do you have?”
Customer: “A white one.”
7). Tech Support: “Type ‘A:’ at the prompt.”
Customer: “How do you spell that?”
8). Tech Support: “What’s on your screen right now?”
Customer: “A stuffed animal that my boyfriend got me at the grocery store.”
9). Tech Support: “What operating system are you running?”
Customer: “Pentium.”
10). Customer: “My computer’s telling me I performed an illegal abortion.”
11).Customer: “I have Microsoft Exploder.”
12).Customer: “How do I print my voicemail?”
13). Customer: “You’ve got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print document, but the computer won’t boot properly.”
Tech Support: “What does it say?”
Customer: “Something about an error and non-system disk.”
Tech Support: “Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?”
Customer: “No, but there’s a sticker saying there’s an Intel inside.”
14). Tech Support: “Just call us back if there’s a problem. We’re open 24 hours.”
Customer: “Is that Eastern time?”
15). Tech Support: “What does the screen say now?”
Customer: “It says, ‘Hit ENTER when ready’.”
Tech Support: “Well?”
Customer: “How do I know when it’s ready?”
16). A plain computer illeterate guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.
Tech: What’s the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: You’ll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don’t! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You’ll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.
10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don’t normally tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the CONFIG.SYS. Letme know how it goes.
10 minutes later.
User: It didn’t work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That’s your problem there. That version of DOS didn’t come with NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you the file. Let me know how it goes.
1 hour later.
User: I need a new power supply.
Tech: How did you come to that conclusion?
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said, and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn’t compatible with NOSMOKE.
Great collection. Incidents similar to these happened to me and that’s what made my job so much fun.
I love the them here. Is it available for download anywhere? Thanks!
Wow ! wonderful information what a great web content, I have added your site to my favor list. and I will keep an eye on it, Thanks.
great post save up the great work.
great post keep up the countless work.
Hey there. I truly wished to firmly make a good brief remark and also inform you understand that I’ve been focusing on your personal page for quite some time. Keep up the very very good efforts and I’m going to be checking back once more in a little while.
Hi, are you allowing any advertising in your website? I would like to purchase a banner for a month or two linking to my website that is closely related. Let me know, or give me an email address that I can reach you at. Cheers!
Can you tell us more about this? I’d care to find out more details.
I like what you guys are up too. Such smart work and reporting! Carry on the excellent works guys I have incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it will improve the value of my website
Hey there! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a group of volunteers and starting a new initiative in a community in the same niche. Your blog provided us beneficial information to work on. You have done a wonderful job!
Thanks for the post I actually learned something from it. Very good content on this site Always looking forward to new post.
Fantastic article. Sustain up the very superb work.
“You may have not calculated to accomplish as a result, excluding I weigh up you have managed to communicate the testify of mind that a lot of people are in.”
My friend send me link to your website. I must thank him. It’s the best website on the net?
Enjoyed reading this, very good stuff, regards . “It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others.” by John Andrew Holmes.
Hi there good content within your webpage I hope you continue writing this top quality reports Many thanks:)
my girl reffered others to your website. so far discovered lots of informative content articles. thanks for your time. saved plus we will be back for sure.
I was recommended this web site by my cousinI am not sure whether this post is written by him as no one else know such detailed about my problemYou’re wonderful! Thanks!
Thanks mate for this info.
Thanks a lot for this article.
I definitely like this article! If it’s not too much trouble write more articles…
Enjoyed reading through this, very good stuff, thanks . “It is in justice that the ordering of society is centered.” by Aristotle.
I greatly appreciate this blog! If it’s not too much trouble create more tutorials…
“Just wish to say your article is as astounding. The clarity in your post is simply excellent and i can assume you’re an expert on this subject. Fine with your permission allow me to grab your RSS feed to keep updated with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please keep up the rewarding work.”
I’ve been surfing on-line more than 3 hours as of late, yet I never found any interesting article like yours. It’s beautiful worth enough for me. In my view, if all webmasters and bloggers made excellent content material as you probably did, the net will probably be a lot more helpful than ever before. “No nation was ever ruined by trade.” by Benjamin Franklin.
“I was reading through some of your articles on this website and I think this web site is real instructive! Continue putting up.”
Youre so cool! I dont suppose Ive read anything like this before. So nice to find somebody with some original thoughts on this subject. realy thank you for starting this up. this website is something that is needed on the web, someone with a little originality. useful job for bringing something new to the internet!
I didn’t know that. Thanks for taking the time to enlighten me. I’ll be sure to come back to see what else you can teach me!
I’m impressed, I must say. Really rarely do I encounter a blog that’s both educative and entertaining, and let me tell you, you have hit the nail on the head. Your idea is outstanding; the issue is something that not enough people are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy that I stumbled across this in my search for something relating to this.
There are some interesting points in time in this article but I don’t know if I see all of them center to heart. There is some validity but I will take hold opinion until I look into it further. Good article , thanks and we want more! Added to FeedBurner as well
I entirely appreciate this blog. If you will create more.
Sorry this might be a bit late but I just wanted to say thanks to the people who have commented here. Really good discussion
I was very pleased to find this web-site.I wanted to thanks for your time for this wonderful read!! I definitely enjoying every little bit of it and I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff you blog post.
I think you’ll never stop! This is often the most nice blogs I’ve ever read
Sup. I just simply desired to actually leave a good short observation and also inform you grasp that in fact I’ve been pursuing your particular weblog for quite some time. Keep up the very good efforts and I’m going to be looking back once more in the near future.
Youre so cool! I dont suppose Ive read something like this before. So good to seek out any person with some authentic ideas on this subject. realy thanks for beginning this up. this web site is something that’s needed on the internet, someone with somewhat originality. useful job for bringing something new to the internet!
What a great blog
It’s a great honor to read high quality material in this day and time. This article has all the qualities I expect in good writing. I hope you know you are truly talented. Thank you.
Sup there administrator, I actually needed to make a quick comment to say that in fact I appreciated your blog post. Thanks!
Wow, awesome web log layout! How long have you been blogging for? You make blogging look simple. The entire look of your website is amazing, let alone the content!
We stumbled over here from a different page and thought I may as well check things out. I like what I see so i am just following you. Look forward to exploring your web page yet again.
I’m impressed, I must say. Really rarely do I encounter a blog that’s both educative and entertaining, and let me tell you, you have hit the nail on the head. Your idea is outstanding; the issue is something that not enough people are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy that I stumbled across this in my search for something relating to this.
I must say you’re very skilled at writing if you can convince me of something like this. I’m truly impressed by your knowledge and writing abilities. Please keep up the good work. Thanks for sharing.
very nice post, i certainly love this website, keep on it
I actually wanted to compose a small note to express my thanks you for a few of the pleasant secrets you are showing on this webpage.
visionunlimited.info has interesting content
is hydroxycut safe
I appreciate your post, it was interesting and compelling. I have found my way here through Google, I am going to return over again
Hi there, nice blog just wanted to acknowledge that with a comment
I would say it can be my extremely 1st time viewing your web site. I can undoubtedly write that it contains a great number of helpful points. Excellent website. I just finished mine and i was looking for some ideas and you gave me a couple of. Great read!
Cool blog page, I’m going to be back again